~ Early on in our relationship the sex was dynamic. Like many other couples we couldn’t get enough of each other. He’s 31, I’m 28. We’re both professionals, fit, and fairly attractive. It’s definitely not a health issue or lack of feeling attracted to each other that has led to our three year relationship being where its at right now.
Like most millennials, neither of us are obsessed with work nor are we workaholics for that matter. We have decent jobs, come from fairly normal families, and if you look at our lives via our Facebook pages, we look like everyone else you know in life. We live in Midtown, Detroit, and at least once or twice a week we go out with friends to local tap houses and we have a lot of friends in various bands so we definitely get out on the town a lot and have fun together.
Over the past year our sex life has taken a dramatic turn sour. I’ve never been in a relationship this long, so maybe this is the normal course that all relationships take. But I don’t understand why my BF would rather sit and play online video games with his friends all night instead of getting naked in bed with me.
I’m the kind of gal that likes to take the bull by the horn. I approached him back in the summer and asked him straight up, “What’s the deal?!” His response was the typical thing you might hear, “I love you babe, of course I love having sex with you” and that night we spent nearly two hours getting down and dirty. That was 5 months ago. Ever since I can count on one hand the number of times we’ve done the deed.
I think in my boyfriend’s perfect world he would just like me to go down on him while he’s in the middle of Halo or whatever game he’s playing, that way he could get the best of both worlds. But what’s in it for me? Sure I get an element of satisfaction in making him feel pleasure, but if I capitulated every night to merely going down on him and then leaving him be, I think more than my throat might start experiencing bit of a ‘used feeling’.
I don’t want to break up. I just can’t see spending the rest of my life feeling neglected in bed. We both want to have children some time, so I know I will have those nights to look for, but until then, what is a modern millennial gal supposed to do?
Are video games really that much more fun then getting down and dirty with me? I don’t think my self-esteem is bruised, but lately my faith in humanity is suffering a bit. What is the point of all this technology if this is where it leaves us as people?
Some days I think the best option is to simply give my boyfriend what he wants, other days I write an article like this and wonder what my life will be like ten years from now.
*Stock photo Sarah Sharp unsplash.com